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Commission: Slowness spell accident by EduartBoudewijn Commission: Slowness spell accident by EduartBoudewijn
Here's another commission I've been working on for the past few days; another one for chomper89 this time featuring his Blood Elf character being transformed into a turtle by her malfunctioning Polymorph staff. Had quite a bit of fun with this one; I hope you all will enjoy it too!
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:iconstephobrien:
The foreground of this picture looks very clean and professional! The clothing ruffles look very convincing, though they're slightly inconsistent on the red robe; one part of it is inexplicably smoother on top than the rest. Aside from that, you did a great job of showing the texture of each piece of fabric, with some parts being noticeably stiffer and others more limp, as well as the texture of the turtle's skin and shell, and the metallic ornaments.

The character's expression of incredulous, horrified shock is perfect for the situation. I can certainly see why she's so upset - not only has she been turned into a turtle, but the staff didn't even have the decency to give her a shell large enough to hide inside!

I'm a bit confused by the belt/sash; with most of the clothing, it makes sense for it to end up either on or off of her body the way you drew it, but the thing around her waist doesn't make sense to me. Is it part of her clothing that got fused into her body under her shell? Body markings? Something else?

I like the ominous yet slightly goofy appearance of the staff; the head looks like it's trying to be intimidating, but got a little bit confused in the process. Appropriate for something so accidentally dangerous to its wielder.

The weak point of this picture is, as you could probably guess, the background. I understand that you probably wanted to keep it from detracting focus from the primary subjects of the picture, but I feel like the contrast in the levels of detail is too high and abrupt. It especially looks odd where they directly intersect, like where the clearly detailed staff is embedded in an ambiguous blur.

I think it would have been better to make an at least semi-detailed landscape around the main subjects, with grass and clearly discernable ground, then blur out the hills and bushes behind them.

If the purple effect is supposed to be mist, I recommend making it more wispy, with some pointed ends instead of a cloud of rounded blobs. And if it was supposed to be a glow, I think it would have looked better as purple light draped over the turtle and clothes. It depends on the effect you were going for.

My final suggestion would be to pick a direction for the shading and stick with it. As it is, I can't tell where the light's supposed to be coming from.

In summary: really good linework and coloring, with some room for improvement in the shading, background and special effects. I hope you found my suggestions useful.
What do you think?
The Artist thought this was FAIR
3 out of 3 deviants thought this was fair.

The Artist has requested Critique on this Artwork

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:iconapples-ishness:
apples-ishness Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2017  Professional Digital Artist
Hi :wave:

Quite an amusing scene :D
I love how the character seems so distraught but the Polymorph staff seems so indifferent. Just like when your cat breaks something and then looks at you like nothing happened! 

Overall the drawing is very well done. There are pleasing shapes and spaces that make up an excellent artwork with a good balance between detail and clear space.

The only suggestion I would make is for the composition of the scene. The drawing is rather tightly cropped and objects are scattered rather than strategically placed to better reveal the situation that is unfolding. The character coming out of the clothes would still work brilliantly as is if the rest of the objects came together in a tighter composition, but with a taller (longer) canvas to add more height.
Specifically, I'd suggest to make these changes:
  • The Polymorph staff seems to be hanging in the air rather than pinned to the ground. I think the position of the staff should be behind the clothing on the ground - there isn't a need to see it connect to the ground as the viewers would be able to tell it was pinned to the ground anyway. Also, the staff could be much longer or to its fullest extent - adding height would create a natural "lead" to the rest of the scene and make the situation even more comical because it would seem that the staff is "lording over its master".
  • The scattered clothing could be bundled around the staff's bottom end (I assume she was holding it while casting the spell) which would make for a better composition overall. Bring the clothes together but keep them scattered while still maintaining a bundle shape. The boots (I'm assuming she wore boots?) could be on either side of the staff, perhaps with one laying flat and the other standing half upright - that might add even more humour to the scene.

If something about this doesn't make sense, please let me know! Also, these are just suggestions for improvement - you don't need to take any of this to heart.

Commented on behalf of ProjectComment
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:iconeduartboudewijn:
EduartBoudewijn Featured By Owner Sep 13, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
Hello, thanks a bunch for your critique! I really appreciate you taking the time :) 

The composition was definitely a big thing in this piece; I tested out several compositions in thumbnails and although I think the final composition isn't the worst, it could definitely be better. 

Interestingly both having the "frame" with more height and having the staff contact the ground behind the clothes came to mind at the time, but I discounted both; the first out of fear for having too much "negative space"  in the image and the second for fear of having people not understand that the staff was pinned into the ground. So it's very interesting that you mention those again; perhaps I should not have discounted those options so easily. Food for though for sure. 
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:iconcreativesam:
creativesam Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2017
Ooops! No refunds, no returns, no exchanges (with former form)...
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:iconeduartboudewijn:
EduartBoudewijn Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
You break it, you bought it? 
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:iconcreativesam:
creativesam Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2017
That could be the case. I didn't read the fine print...

The fine print had all these strange looking symbols... I thought it beast to leave well enough alone.
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:iconlordbwargle:
lordbwargle Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017
Whatever happens, don't let the plumbers find her! :)
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:iconeduartboudewijn:
EduartBoudewijn Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
That's her own lookout; I just transform them, after that they're on their own =p 
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:iconwildace88:
wildace88 Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017
Well theres an odd mix of elf and turtle lol quite intriguing 
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:iconeduartboudewijn:
EduartBoudewijn Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
Thank you ^^
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:icondarkzadar-zero:
DARKZADAR-ZERO Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
now she is turtle enough for the turtle club hopefully .
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:iconeduartboudewijn:
EduartBoudewijn Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
She can go start her own turtle club if she wants =p That's how turtley she is!
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:icondarkzadar-zero:
DARKZADAR-ZERO Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
cowabunga ! 
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:iconschnopszilla:
Schnopszilla Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017
I ain't played WoW in years I used to play a Blood Elf Mage on Llane server called Eiramona
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:iconeduartboudewijn:
EduartBoudewijn Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
I never played WoW so most of those names mean absolutely nothing to me =p 
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:icontffan01:
tffan01 Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017
Gotta be careful with your toys.  Always follow the instruction manual.
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:iconeduartboudewijn:
EduartBoudewijn Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
Bring them in for maintenance every now and again; don't be a cheapskate with your reality altering artifacts!
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:iconklatuk4u:
klatuk4u Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017
Thats a new one!  Very cool!
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:iconeduartboudewijn:
EduartBoudewijn Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
Thanks ^^
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:iconturnedintodragon:
TurnedIntoDragon Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017
Rip
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:iconeduartboudewijn:
EduartBoudewijn Featured By Owner Aug 7, 2017  Hobbyist Artist
Rip might be a bit strong; she might be able to find some other mages to help her out. 
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